My wife may kill me for writing this. I'm not sure. Actually, she may not care. And honestly, she'll probably never know about it - I’m not convinced she reads my columns.
The Story Behind the Object
I'm asleep in my bed. It's somewhere around 3 a.m. Suddenly, my wife speaks from beside (but not in) our bed.
"Hey, can you turn the light on?" In this particular house, our bedroom light and fan were turned on and off by a remote control which was typically on my end table. Startled, and now moderately disgruntled at being awoken in the middle of the night, I hit the light button on the remote. I roll over, and there stands my wife beside her side of the bed. She looks down, then back up at me.
"Yup. My water just broke."
Our first child was due on our anniversary, June 4th. And here it was, May 7th. Water broken. Exactly four weeks prior to the day the doctor said I should expect to become a father, I'm suddenly about to become a father. It's here that I'd like to point out that several months prior to this I was forced to waste an entire Saturday of my life at a birthing class, and the only thing I remember from it is the lady saying, and I quote, "it's not like you see in the movies. Your water only breaks before you go into labor like 10% of the time." Oh yeah? Guess we should play the lottery. Because you know what? HAPPENED WITH BOTH OUR KIDS!!! At least the second time I was somewhat expecting it. But this was the first time. And it was four weeks early. And I was not prepared.
Anyway, long story short, we got up and ready, rolled out to the hospital, and roughly 10 hours, many screams, and one epidural later, we were the proud parents of a six pound, nine ounce baby boy. Nice.
Did I mention we were moving in a week? We were. Probably the only thing worse for a woman than moving when you're 37 weeks pregnant is moving with a seven day old baby. Did I mention our movers double-booked themselves and bailed on us just days before we moved? Good times. All those issues aside, we did it and we lived to tell about it. There was much weeping and gnashing of teeth, and we’ll probably never move again, but we survived.
But with all of the annoyances of having a first child and moving within seven days of one another, I keep coming back to how irritating it was to be woken up in the middle of the night and asked to turn on the light. That would have been completely unnecessary if we’d just had this handy dandy Carolina Basketball nightlight in our bedroom by my wife’s side of the bed, instead of it being down the hall in our Tar Heel themed spare bedroom/office. Sure, technically, she probably still would have woken me up to help with some other tasks, like driving to the hospital and… Actually, I guess my only real contribution was driving her to the hospital. But still, she would have wanted me there.
Funnily enough, I almost wasn’t there. I had been in Philadelphia for work for the couple of days prior to what I like to refer to as the Great Water Breakage of 2010. When my flight landed at noon on May 6th, I had no idea that a mere 15 hours later I’d be awoken in the middle of the night to find my wife starting the labor process. Fifteen hours, though. Plenty of time to spare.
Carolina Collectibles Description
This Carolina night light is nothing if not sturdy. Measuring just 8” in diameter, you wouldn’t expect it to be all that heavy. But if my bathroom scale is to be believed (and while there are days I wish it wasn’t, I think it is), this sucker weighs two and a half pounds. The heaviest portion is the exterior, which looks like a basketball - complete with textured grips. The actual night light portion on the inside is much lighter - pun intended. It has Rameses in the middle of a Carolina blue interlocking NC, which reads “CAROLINA TAR HEELS.”
Unfortunately, even with a new set of batteries, this night light no longer lights up. It still hangs on the wall and serves as a nice piece of decoration, but it’s no longer functional. Which is fine because, at 33, I’m finally past the age of needing a night light.
Carolina Collectibles Comparison: Byron Sanders
Lord Byron arrived in Chapel Hill with a fair amount of promise after being named Mr. Basketball in the state of Mississippi in 2002. In his freshman year, especially after Sean May was sidelined with a foot injury, Sanders was a fairly solid contributor. However, his 550 minutes played that season were only 36 shy of his total minutes for the next three seasons combined. Considering the Heels won the National Championship his junior year (when he averaged only three minutes per game), perhaps - much like the night light - his services were more valuable early on in his career. He was still great to have on the bench and will forever be remembered fondly, he just wasn’t the spotlight player. (See what I did there? Another “light” pun.)
Carolina Collectibles Rating: 2 Stars
Even fully functioning, this night light was only a three star item. Now limited to just providing some decoration to the wall, it drops to two stars. Not every item can be highly rated, and just because something isn’t highly rated doesn’t mean it can’t do its part to make sure the true stars are able to shine. (Shine. I did it again.)